Photographed by Koji Arboleda for the October 2022 Issue of Vogue Philippines
“Teaching allows me to share that dream with young dancers,” says Ballet Philippines Dance School Director Rhea Dumdum-Bautista.
This essay is a part of the series Vogue Voices, Vogue Philippines’ biweekly series of personal essays on memory, culture, moments, identity, family, and community.
#ilovemyjob
I truly do. As a ballet school director and teacher, I have the honor and pleasure of being part of my students’ dance journey. Some become professionals, others don’t, but I know they all learn something they can use in life. But there was a time that I was vehemently against becoming a full-time teacher and calling it my career. The profession kept calling me for decades, but I persistently kept it at bay because my dream job was something else.
I was about 10 years old in Cebu when I decided being a ballerina was what I wanted to be when I grew up. Unlike most girls who were forced to take ballet by their mothers, it was I who wanted to do it after seeing classes held in the school gym. Before long, I had fallen in love with it, and everything in my life revolved around it. It was easy for me to swap fun time with family and friends for disciplined class and rehearsals. I made my school grades and behavior exemplary enough to earn my no-questions-asked hours spent dancing. My parents supported me wholeheartedly, but I tried to be as independent as possible by commuting to my lessons, spending whole summers in Manila away from my parents to train, and earning money as a teacher as soon as I hit my teens.
Dancing was my dream. There was a comfort in knowing what I was passionate about and what I wanted to do with my life. I liked that my life was unconventional.
Right after college graduation, just when I thought I could live my dream as a professional dancer, I broke my foot. The metatarsals on my left foot got dislocated. At first, I was determined to get back. But one year after the injury, the doctor said the bones were misaligned and I needed surgery to realign and fuse the bones with screws. Then, I had to wait about another nine months before I could try dancing again.
It was getting exhausting trying to keep the dream alive. I had no choice but to wake up. I decided to give up my dream and try a new career.
I had just graduated, so I thought I’d try to be normal for a change. Maybe try one of those regular office jobs in Makati. Then someone suggested to me to teach.
Teach? As in high school English?
No, teach as in ballet.
Oh. No, thanks.
I only wanted to be a dancer, the prima ballerina who would be the star onstage, not the teacher in the windowless basement studio seeing all the other dancers pass her by. I imagined it would be too painful for me. I told everyone who suggested it: Teaching is something I would only do on the side.
I got a job in a magazine and eventually became an associate editor. I taught ballet on the side.
By some miracle, I got a second chance to live my dream. I clawed my way back to the stage and was able to dance full-time with Ballet Philippines for five seasons. During that time, I taught ballet, mounted shows, and learned about teaching on the side.
I stopped dancing for the company when I started a family. I let my dream go, but for real this time. I did not go for a third chance. I tried new careers in PR and management, thinking anything outside the dance world would be easier to integrate with family life. (It wasn’t.) While raising three children, I filled my cup by teaching ballet, writing dance curricula, conducting workshops, and coaching on the side.
The scales tipped in favor of teaching when, while holding a good position in the company, my principal made me choose between my main job and my side job. The mere suggestion shook me to the core. I can’t give up my side job.
This thing on the side, I kept it there because I thought it would be too painful to do. Now, I realized the reverse was true. Teaching was healing me. It was as natural as breathing. Nerdy pedagogy got me excited. Mentoring children taught me about life. I always had job offers and opportunities. It was a career that I sustained and cultivated over decades… on the side!
But because I was too afraid of potential pain, I limited myself. So, together with a renewed faith in God, I went all into the career that had been calling me all my life. Since then, my growth has been immense.
I earned decently even with fewer hours. I spent less time on the road and more time with my children. I expanded my network. I became kind, present, and attentive to myself. I learned to accept God’s blessings and be grateful for them. I felt peaceful and powerful.
When the pandemic struck, I was confused like everyone else. But by teaching, I could do things I never imagined. I became an early adopter of online classes. I was surprised at how entrepreneurial I was. I learned and adjusted along the way. What started out as something to pass the time and stay in shape at home became a place to connect when the isolation started to kick in. Teachers and studio owners came together to find ways to keep their businesses afloat, and artists created together. It was also during the pandemic that Ballet Philippines asked me to head its dance school, challenging me to be creative and malleable while staying true to our art and our values.
I teach ballet full-time. It is my career, and I do it together with my other roles in life. Now, I can say it is the main thing I do because I know it doesn’t mean that I gave up on my original dream. Instead, teaching allows me to share that dream with young dancers, helping them to develop into the kind of dancers I dreamed of being. What better way to spend your working life than contributing to the development of a human being!
#ilovemyjob. I truly do.
Rhea Dumdum-Bautista is the director of Ballet Philippines Dance School.
Photographer: Koji Arboleda, Lighting Designer: John Batalla, Fashion Director: Pam Quiñones, Makeup Artist: Janell Capuchino, Hairstylist: Mong Amado, Nails: Extraordinail, Models: Ica Dy, Maisie Briones, and Paloma Laforteza, Producer: Anz Hizon, Fashion Associate: Renee De Guzman, Assistant Photographer: Gab Villareal, Assistant Lighting Designer: Anthony Opeda, Lighting & Technical Team: Raymund Denaga, Jomar Trinilla, Marvin Jalbuena, Jovy Delantar, Genesis Berry, and Ronald Gutierrez, Production Design Team: Miguel Alomajan, Rey John Legaspi, CJ Garcia, Jheno Sonio, Kenneth Vence Murillo, Miguel Timbol, and Ernesto Legtan of Rocket Designs
